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im lost, so lost, im lost at sea, you'll see

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[21 Jul 2009|06:41am]
[ mood | accomplished ]

Not even a day off work and I realize I have way too much time on my hands. Even with work taking up 99.9% of my time, energy and soul. I really do work the worst shift to try and maintain any kind of social life. I only say this because I spent the last three hours researching linux and trying to figure out how the hell to navigate around my own computer. I feel like i'm cracking into the FBI with all these text based command prompts. Weren't we supposed to leave those back in the 80's? DOS died along with spandex, suckas. Get with the times linux and stop making me feel retarded. I need my Windows back.


Work has been as shitty as ever. For being the largest company in the world, Wal-mart acts like they're going bankrupt. I've never worked for a more underhanded and ass backwards company. Especially at store level. Retail is the worst industry to be in during our "economical crisis". Everyone in retail will know where i'm coming from. If we have any more cutbacks or layoffs, there's gonna be no one to run the goddamn store. I'm starting to feel like a whipping mule with the amount of work they're putting on my shoulders. Hire some fucking people and stop treating me like a slave. But hey, I guess that's how they keep number one. Fucking cheap bastards.

Other than that, i'm just starting to get used to life out on my own. Financially, it's a lot better than I expected. Having two incomes really makes life so much easier. I'm lacking in the home furnishings department, but getting my Internet back was so much more important than a couch. So what if my guests have to sit on milk crates? lmao.

I had a quick conversation with Tracie the other day, and her voice was even cuter than I remembered. I'm glad to hear you're doing fine, babe.

I'm still missing some screennames for MSN. Help me out people.

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I'm movin on up! [16 Jul 2009|08:29am]
HOLY HELL, IT CAN'T BE.

OH, BUT IT CAN.

....But this is meant to be my sincere and triumphant return post so my wit will have to wait for another time. You all know there's plenty to go around.


This may be one of the few times in my life that i'm speechless. And you all know that happens few and very far between with me. It took me about an hour to search through my journal and see all your profiles and simply reminisce and look back on all of my relationships with all of you. Or should I say lost relationships with all of you.

I know i've been in this position before and i'll completely understand if alot of you shun me simply based off my track record of the last couple years. I do have reasons why I couldn't be here, but not enough good ones and certainly nothing that could justify me not being here for all of you like you all were for me throughout the years. But I do feel like you deserve an explanation.

In the last several months my life has changed drastically. More so than it'd ever had. I gathered the strength to pull my life out of the standstill I had it in for years and I feel like i've finally begun living. The independence, motivation and determination I have towards life is indescribable. I've moved on from my parents. Enough had been enough a long time ago and I found myself realizing more everyday that me 'staying for my siblings' was just an excuse my subconscious derived up as the easy way out. My mind forced me to have an epiphany i'd been holding in for a long time. I didn't have to be living in the same roof as them to make sure their needs were being met. There is only so much I can do as their sister. Infact, me having an apartment of my own was better for all of us. When they get older and they reach the point I did, i'll be there to give them that place to stay and the love they don't get at home. They know they'll always have me there and that's all that matters.

I've got to be honest though, I didn't do it all on my own. You know I love you all and I don't mean to break any hearts *prepares for the mob lynching* Your woman is tied down. I have a boyfriend. But I don't want to make this post too long and I sure as hell am not going to be one of those bitches that talks about her man all the time, but I will say he is pretty much the male version of me and that should tell you all enough. We already have plenty of stories to tell the grandkids.


He came at the most unexpected but mostly needed time and I wouldn't trade him in for the world. And so much for me never being the hopeless romantic. *sighs*

Hell, I even have a cat. Nothing says welcome to adulthood like having your own pet. The cat, not the boyfriend. lmao.

I've turned over a new leaf so to speak, but I knew it wouldn't be complete until I got back here to my roots and back into contact with all of you. For good this time, no ifs and or buts about it.

Now if you've made it this far and I hope you all have, I want numbers, and messenger screennames and a comment to let me know that you are all alive and healthy and having babies and me here wondering why they're not mine. I'll be happy to fill you in with all the little details I left out of this post.

And the only fitting way to end this.....ROB FOR LIFE. :D

You know you missed that.
25 comments|post comment

o.O [07 Apr 2007|08:28pm]
LINKIN PARK frontman MIKE SHINODA harbours a bizarre secret urge - to get arrested by police.
The musician and record producer insists there's no faster way to earn respect from pals than an encounter with cops.
He says, "I think it would be cool to get arrested to a certain degree... I feel like you get high fives from your buddies for getting arrested.
"If you had a sword fight with your buddy that would be so cool, it's a very tough, manly thing to do. And I'm obviously equating getting arrested with swordplay in my sick mind."


...........I knew there was a reason I used to go after this guy with rakes. Muse, anyone?
4 comments|post comment

[06 May 2005|01:55am]
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